


The Last Summer Romance

by MercuryHomophony



Series: To Date A Cervitaur [3]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: ???? stanford, Deerper, F/F, Gargrunkle Stan, MerMabel, Monster Falls AU, and many more - Freeform, gorgon Pacifica
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-06
Updated: 2015-09-06
Packaged: 2018-04-19 10:32:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4742996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MercuryHomophony/pseuds/MercuryHomophony
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mabel is nearing the end of her sweet 16, and she’s realizing it’s her “last” chance to have a sweet summer romance. In desperation, she ropes the Mystery Shack crew into throwing an enormous party to try and get her a date. Things don’t go as expected, but end up better than planned.<br/>(Takes place well before TDaC, can be read alone)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Last Summer Romance

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys~!  
> This short takes place well before the events in To Date a Cervitaur! If you're here just for the Mabcifica, congrats - you don't have to read that in order to understand this. All you need to know is that this is a Monster Falls AU!

“DIIIIPPPPPEEEERRRR!” The cervitaur flinched at the piercing shriek that echoed through the Shack, cutting through the thin walls like tissue paper. He looked longingly down at the book he was paging through, then sighed, sliding a bookmark between the pages and putting it down on the nightstand.

He knew better than to ignore his twin when she was using that tone of voice.

He left his room, walked down the steep ramp to the downstairs, and poked his head into the living room. A quick glance, and he spotted Mabel, floating in her tank next to the couch.

“What is it?” He tried not to look up in the direction of his room, and failed. “I was working on something…”

“Dipper, I had the best idea!” Dipper tried not to feel unnerved by the grin she was sending him, but the sharp teeth and the oddly reflective eyes were still weird, even after four years. “We’re gonna throw a party!”

That… hadn’t been what he was expecting, but oddly, he was less surprised. “We’re gonna do what now?”

Mabel reached over the edge of her tank, cranking the mechanism Ford had installed to roll her tank towards the cervitaur. “We’re gonna throw the biggest end of summer shindig this town has ever seen!” She threw one soggy, sweater-clad arm around his shoulders, pulling him in and gesturing wildly to the air. “Just picture it - end of summer, our sweet 16th wrapping up, we’ll invite all our friends, do some wild, crazy shenanigans…” She tightened her grip, caught up in her own imagination. “It’ll be spectacular! No! Better - it’ll be… sparkle-tacular!” Finally letting Dipper loose, she gasped, clapping a hand over her mouth. “Ooh! We can even raid Grunkle Stan’s fireworks stash, and let a few of those loose!”

“Seriously? I’m pretty sure we could just ask and he’d give them to us.”

“No!” she whirled in her tank, splashing the poor soggy cervitaur. “Oh. Whoops.” She grinned sheepishly at Dipper, who gave her a defeated glare from underneath his water-logged bangs. “But, we can’t tell Grunkle Stan! Or Ford!”

“What? Why not?”

“Dipper, we’re 16! Almost 17! In like, three years we’re gonna be adults!” Her fist shot into the air. “We gotta get all our teenage rebellion out! We’ve hardly done anything really interesting in the past few years -”

“We stopped a cult, officiated a gnome wedding, started another cult, completely by accident, found the Grobblewonker-”

“Okay, but nothing like… Teen worthy! That’s all supernatural jazz, which is awesome! But, where’s our ‘fight the system’ attitude? Remember when Wendy and the gang were our age? They were always sneaking into things, and baiting Thompson to do stuff… Wasn’t that fun?”

“The one time we did that with them, you ended up being possessed by convenience store ghosts.”

She scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Fine. What about the Woodstick Festival? You were gung-ho about that!”

Dipper smiled a little, thinking fondly over the memory. “Yeah… even with that Love God fiasco, that was pretty fun,” he admitted. He frowned again, concerned. “But what brought this on, anyways? Out of the blue ideas are pretty normal for you, but this isn’t your usual wild, sprinkle-filled scheme.”

“Whaaa?” Mabel grinned widely, her eyes darting to the side, looking everywhere but Dipper. “Psh, ulterior motive? Who said I had an ulterior motive?”

Dipper crossed his arms, looking stern. It was times like these that he missed having toes to tap, so he settled for drumming his fingers instead. “Mabel.”

Mabel’s eyes met his for a brief second, then flicked down, and her grin drooped. “It’s nothing, really…”

“It’s not nothing, it’s clearly bothering you.”

Mabel seemed to be caught in an internal debate, but Dipper just waited patiently. He was rewarded when she finally sighed, shoulders sagging. “Dipper, we’re 16, and I know you don’t care-”

“Mabel, I care if it bugs you!”

She shot him an annoyed look. “Let me finish. I was going to say, you don’t care about romance as much as I do.” She waited for his acknowledgment, and he shrugged sheepishly.

“Okay, that’s true.”

“But I just… feel like it’s my last summer to have a good ol’ teen romcom summer fling! And it’s nearly over!”

“So… this party is for…”

“A setting for the last, best summer fling ever.” Her enthusiasm had resurfaced with vigor. “No supervision, no rules, just a bunch of people having fun. We can even make it a costume party, so we can get some out-of-towners.” Her eyes widened, sparkling and pleading in that way only mermaids could manage. “I’m good at parties, but I need someone who’s good with organization to help me put it together and keep it together. And you’re the best at organizing things! You’re the guy with the lists, bro-bro!”

She held her breath, waiting while her brother thought it over. His expression was pensive - she knew he had research he was working on, studies into the supernatural and their transformations, and he was likely weighing doing this for her versus working on that instead. Finally, he heaved a heavy sigh, and her heart dropped. He was going to say no.

“Mabel, I’m afraid if you want to pull this off…” he paused dramatically, and her heart lifted a little in hope. He mirrored her earlier grin. “...we’re gonna need more people.”

 

xx

 

“Alright everyone, listen up! Operation “Mabel’s Last Fling of Summer,” or MaLFoS for short, is underway!” Mabel rolled down the line, novelty heart-shaped sunglasses and homemade “Party Gal” sweater equipped. Her “volunteers” waited for her to continue, sharing a few raised eyebrows and one or two awkward coughs. “This is gonna be the biggest, baddest, most unsupervised party Gravity Falls has ever seen, people! And you!” She whipped around, pointing her star-tipped glitter wand at the line. “You guys are the ones who are gonna make it happen!”

She clasped her arms behind her back. “Captain Dipper will be letting you know what your roles are!”

Dipper stepped forward, shuffling through some papers. “Alright, so first things first - if we’re gonna have this thing unsupervised, we’re gonna need to get the Stans, Deputy Durland and Sheriff Blubs out of the way. We need something to keep them occupied for at least 24 hours - enough to setup and throw the party, with hopefully some time to clean up afterwards so that Stanley won’t actually kill us when they get back to the Shack.” He turned to Robbie, who was currently adjusting his rotting hand, and Tambry, who was plugged in to her phone. “Tambry, Robbie, you two are on police duty - misdemeanors, electrical disturbances, throwing rocks at abandoned buildings… just little things. Ideally, we just wear them down, and they won’t be a problem during the actual party. Got it?”

“Peh, whatever,” Robbie groaned, kicking the ground apathetically. His foot got caught on some scruff and popped off, and he stumbled backwards - fortunately, his cybernetic girlfriend caught him before he could fall apart anymore.

“Affirmative,” she buzzed, distracted by her phone. Dipper rolled his eyes. That was the best he was going to get out of them, but he knew once the mischief got underway, they’d do their part.

“As for the Stans… Thompson, we’ve gotten the gnomes in on this, but uh… you’re basically gonna need to play the damsel in distress.”

The hamster-boy hybrid shrugged. “Well, its not the worst thing I’ve had to do…” he replied, optimistic. Dipper winced.

“Yeah, sure…” He’d let Jeff get him up to date on exactly what that entailed. “But, you should still be finished well enough in time to get to the party, though you might have to burrow out. Shouldn’t be too much of a problem.” He checked the list again. “Wendy!”

The werewolf gave him a mock-salute. “Yo!”

“You’re gonna be responsible for getting us the snacks and…” he squinted at the list. “...Mabel, what did you put here?”

“Just some suggestions!”

“You wrote Smile Dip… in glitter…” He shook his head. “Whatever. I’ll get you the list. We’ll cover the cost.”

“We can split it,” Wendy offered, winking at the twins. “After all, gotta support Operation MaLFoS, right?”

Dipper smiled gratefully. “Alright… Soos, you’re on DJ duty again. Let us know what you need, and we’ll get it for you. Candy, Grenda, Mabel - decorations.”

“Whoo!”

“This is excellent!”

“Girls, we’re gonna rock the place.”

While they started whispering plans to each other, Dipper went to the last item on the list. “Finally, Nate and Lee, you’re on spreading the news. Remember, this is gonna be a big deal, but no adults!”

Robbie raised a hand… with his other hand.

“Hey, if we’re doing all this stuff, what are you doing?” he sneered at Dipper, who smirked back at him.

“I’m glad you asked.” He flipped through a few pages, then hefted a drawing up. “This is a sound canceling rune. I’m going to be setting this up around the shack, to help keep anyone who’s not supposed to be here from noticing the party.” There was a brief chorus of “Oooh!”s and “Sweet!” along with a single “meh” from Robbie. “Once we’re done with all that, everyone meet back here - we’ll put the final touches on setup, then we’ll be ready to party!”

The group cheered, splitting up to run their respective tasks - even Mabel, her tank being dragged along by the overenthusiastic mer-pus and fox-girl - leaving Dipper alone on the steps of the Shack.

“Whelp,” he hefted the stack of papers, looking down at the rune. “Time to get to work!”

 

Xx

 

Everything was going  _awesomely_ . Mabel hadn’t seen a shindig this big since their last Mystery Shack Summerween blowout, where everyone had gotten arrested and the Shack had been turned into a temporary jail until Blubs and Durland could get a clean story about what had happened. It had been like an enormous town sleepover!

This was a little smaller, though, being just the teens and young adults of the town. She saw a good number of new faces, which was good - there was hardly a reason to have a summer hookup party with no one to hook up with. And it was just about time to start putting the moooooves on some of these fine young -

“Mabel!”

The mermaid swiveled in her tank. “Pacifica! You made it!”

Pacifica carefully slithered through the crowd, one hand self-consciously holding her sunglasses as she dodged the flailing limbs of the dancers. “Well I wasn’t gonna let my parents keep me out of this. Though, I got a little confused when my valet was driving up - it didn’t sound like much of a party until I got past the barrier.”

“Yeah, Dipper hooked that up! The Stans don’t know about this, and we wanted to keep it that way, so here we are!”

Pacifica smiled, running one hand through her hair. It hissed and curled softly. “Right, right… so, actually, I was trying to call you earlier today. See, I-”

“Ooh, hold that thought just a second, Pacifica. See that cutie over there?”

Pacifica followed Mabel’s pointed finger. “…the goat-boy with the pentagram shirt?”

“Yes. Isn’t he a cutie?”

Pacifica raised one very, incredibly skeptical eyebrow. “Um… no.”

“I’m gonna go talk to him, be right back!” Mabel rolled her tank forward, nearly clipping Pacifica’s coiled tail in the process. The gorgon tried to sputter a protest, but it was too late - Mabel had already vanished into the crowd.

Well, not so much “vanished” as “blown open a path,” but still - said path closed quickly behind her.

She sighed, retreating to the snack bar, but perked up a little when she saw the second half of her friends standing by the punch bowl. “Hey Dipper!”

He startled, looking up from the papers he was holding. “Oh!” A smile slowly blossomed over his face, slightly… lopsided. “Pazifica, you made it!”

“Yeah, that’s what your sister said, too.” She coiled herself into the space next to Dipper, and they looked out over the dance floor. “So, why the party? What’s the occasion?” She glanced over at the papers he was holding. “And… what’s up with the lists?”

“Ah, well…” He leaned towards her, and she leaned in. “Mabel wanted to have like, a big last summer fling, or something, so she asked me to help her throw this party. This-” he hefted the papers, “-is a list of things to keep an eye on to make sure everything goes alright.” He put the papers down, swiping a glass of punch from the table and downing it. “So far, we’re good - everything’s going well. Everyone seems to be having a blast, Mabel’s danced with a few people already, and…” He trailed off, looking back over at Pacifica. “Uhh… your hair is doing that… thing again.”

“Huh? Oh, that. Sorry, it’s got a mind of it’s own.” She patted her hair gently, trying to stop it from doing that “thing” - that is, coiling and hissing angrily. “But, um… why is Mabel looking for a… you said summer fling?”

“Well, we’re talking about Mabel, here,” Dipper replied, humming thoughtfully. “She’s always been big on like, romance and circumstance and just, falling into the right person at the right time.” He put his cup down, and Pacifica could have sworn he swayed, just a little bit. “I think the problem is, she kinda tries to force it sometimes, you know?” He shook his head. “But, even then, she just likes to enjoy time with new people, so if she’s happy, then it’s fine.” He frowned slightly, then, and shook his head. “Anyways… enjoy the party! I’m gonna go make my rounds, make sure everything’s running right.” He grabbed his papers, waved, and walked away, stumbling around the other party-goers as he made his way over to Soos’s DJ table. Pacifica watched him leave, nose wrinkled with confusion, before just sighing and shrugging. Maybe he was just tired - being roped into this kind of party probably took it out of him.

She turned her eyes back to the dance floor, looking for one specific dancer. It wasn’t hard to locate her, especially with the crowd of slipping soggy dancers. She set her face.

She would do it tonight, or die trying.

How badly could it go?

 

Xx

 

“Mabel, everything is falling apart!” Dipper paced back and forth, waving his papers in one hand and another glass of punch in the other. “Someone spit acid onto one of the speakers, and now it’s only playing static; people keep spilling snacks and punch on the floor, which makes people slip and fall, which means _more_ crap getting on the floor, Soos took his break from DJing and has eaten so much ice cream he’s practically _opaque_ , and I just checked the runes - they’re reaching their capacity for sound cancellation, and I don’t know how many more times I can charge them back up!”

“Psh, that doesn’t sound _that_ bad!” Mabel protested, waving a hand to brush his worries away. From the other side of the room, there was a resounding crash from the snacks table, followed by cheering and cries of “Eat it! Eat it!” No doubt they were for Thompson. “Okay, okay, so maybe it’s getting a _little_ out of hand,” she admitted. “But, I’m pretty sure this next guy is a go! And the party is only another hour or so, then we can kick everyone out and clean up.” 

Dipper took another nervous swig of his punch. “I dunno, Mabel… we really need the time to clean up before the Stans get back. I didn’t plan for this much of a mess…”

“We’ll get it done, I swear!” Mabel pleaded. “C’mon, just two more hours. Just- Just one hour! Give me one more hour, Dipper!”

Dipper made a very strange noise, something like a nervous bleat, as he looked over his pages again. “…alright, fine, one more hour. But then we’ve gotta get everyone out and clean up, or we’ll never get it done by morning!”

He turned tail, finishing his drink and making a beeline for the punch, while Mabel nervously scoped out the crowd again. She’d danced with so many people already, it was almost easier to find someone she had danced with than had not. But she had one more hour, she had to make the most of it…

Someone tapped her shoulder. “Mabel? Everything alright?”

She turned, and found herself eye-to-sunglasses with Pacifica. “What? Yeah! I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be fine, look at how cray-cray this party is!” She forced a laugh, scanning the dance floor again and ignoring her friend’s scrutiny.

“Honestly, Mabel? That sounds like the opposite of fine.” She put a hand on the mermaid’s shoulder, giving it a little shake. “What’s going on in that bejeweled brain of yours?”

Mabel shook her head. “Nothing! I mean-” she hastened to correct herself. “Just like, fun! Having some good ol’ teenager crazy fun!” She tried to laugh again, but it fell short of the mark, dying into a sigh at the end. Pacifica frowned with concern.

“Okay, now that you’ve gotten that out of your system, mind telling me what’s actually wrong?”

Mabel sunk in her tank until she was submerged to her nose, and blew some sullen bubbles. Pacifica stood taller on her tail, leaning over the side and looking down.

“Don’t start sulking, just tell me what’s wrong.” More sullen bubbles. “Maybe I can help? I won’t know unless you tell me.”

Mabel pouted underwater, but slowly pulled herself up, resting her arms and chin on the side of the tank. Pacifica coiled back down so they were level. “Well, it’s just-”

“Mabel! Oh man, I’m so glad I found you.” Pacifica glared at Wendy as the werewolf skid to a stop next to them, looking a little stressed. “Okay, so you know how I was in charge of the snacks?”

“Uh… yeah?”

Wendy grabbed her tank, pulling it along after her. Mabel gave Pacifica a quick, helpless wave, not noticing the glower on the snake-girl’s face. “Okay, well, so when I bought the punch, I might have… decided to spice it up, a little? So, after I set it up, I might have like… spiked the punch. Like, a whole lot. And Dipper’s been nervous drinking all night, so uh… yeeeahhh…”

Mabel’s eyes widened. “Where is he now?!”

Wendy pulled them out of the party room, stopping in front of the bathroom. “Good news is, he’s right here. Bad news is…” she threw open the door.

Mabel had expected to see Dipper bent over the toilet - I mean, that should have been the logical conclusion, right? He was 16, had never had alcohol before, and had apparently consumed quite a lot of it over the course of the evening.

What she hadn’t expected was to see her very unconscious brother lying splayed out, surrounded by bits of broken mirror. He didn’t seem badly hurt, just a few nicks and cuts here or there, but…

“What _happened?!_ How did the mirror break?”

“Uh, best I can tell, he thought his reflection was another deer… and he…” Wendy pantomimed charging the mirror with antlers. “…fought for dominance, I guess?”

Mabel smacked her forehead. “Oh my gosh. If this was any other circumstance, that would be hilarious…” She dragged her hand down her face, eyes widening in realization. “Oh, shoot! Dipper was recharging the sound-canceling runes! If they’re not recharged…”

“Uhhh, Hambone?” The two girls turned to see Soos down the hallway, sticking his head out of the party room. “You might wanna come see this.”

“Ugh, could this night get any worse?” Mabel muttered darkly under her breath, rolling her tank forward, Wendy right behind her. They entered the party, and Soos wordlessly pointed to the stage. “So what’s…” Mabel trailed off, her jaw dropping in disbelief. “… _Pacifica?!_ ”

The snake girl was up on stage, having somehow hijacked the DJ station and found a mic. She was looking around, but when her sunglasses-blocked gaze fell on Mabel, she froze. A look of grim determination settled over her face, and she reached over, flipping a switch on the DJ board. The heavy bass dance music cut off with a scratch, followed by a chorus of annoyed groans from the dancers. They died off quickly when a familiar keyboard intro started playing up, changing into cheers.

Mabel put a hand over her heart. She  _knew_ this song…

Pacifica took a deep breath, and started singing -

“Just a small town girl! Living in a lonely world! She took the midnight train off to Gravity Falls!” The crowd went ballistic at the mention, people dancing just as vigorously as before. Pacifica locked gazes with Mabel again. “Just a wealthy girl! Born and raised in… a, a wealthy world!”

“She’s ad-libbing it…” Mabel whispered in awe.

“She stayed and waited here in Gravity Falls!” Pacifica’s tail began to slither in time with the beat. “Goood friends, waiting!” She snapped her fingers along with the tune. “Up and down the aaaavenuuue! Streetlights! People-oh-oh-oh!!”

At the crescendo of the song, she pointed across the crowd, straight at Mabel. With a choir of an entire town’s worth of teens and young adults backing her, she belted the chorus - “Don’t Start! Un-believing! Never don’t not feel your feeeeelings!”

Mabel was crying. She didn’t know when she’d started, but her vision was starting to get blurry. She swiped one hand over her eyes, grinning and pointing back at the snake girl on stage. Pacifica gave her a surprisingly shy smile, a blush blooming over her cheeks as she kept singing.

“Mabel!” The mermaid almost missed Wendy’s shout over the mayhem. “Didn’t you say those runes were almost out of power?”

Her enthusiasm drained almost instantly, transformed to dread as she looked out over the raving crowd, and the cranked up speakers amplifying Pacifica’s voice. “Oh, shit.”

 

Xx

 

“I’m telling you, this is a wild goose chase!” Stanley snapped, glaring at his brother from their hiding spot underneath a bush. They’d been there for a good long while now, chasing down some sort of ‘strange new threat’ that Stanford had discovered.

“It’s not a wild goose chase, Stan!” his twin growled back. “If I’m right, then this is some new mutation of gnome - what happens if they’re hostile?”

“You mean more hostile, Einstein?” Stanley flexed his wings, wincing at the twinge that went through them. “Ugh, if we stay here any longer, my wings are gonna cramp.”

“Look, if you’re so tired, why not just go to sleep and go Stone for a bit?”

“And wake up with moss growing over me? I don’t…” Stanley paused, tilting his head. “…hey, do you hear that?”

“…that ominous, growing humming sound?”

“Yeah, what is-”

 

“ _ **DON’T START! UNBELIEEEVING!”**_

 

A blast of sound literally exploded outward over their heads, knocking down tree-branches and scaring the crap out of a number of wildlife creatures.

“HOLY _SHIT!_ ” 

“What IS that?!”

The two jumped up, taking to the sky and quickly clearing the tree-line. They hovered, looking out at the surrounding area, before a flashy, well-lit building in the distance caught their eye.

“The Shack?”

They paused, listening as more of the rock-ballad pounded out through the night.

“…those two are in so much trouble.”

 

Xx

 

“Pacifica, that was _amazing_!” Mabel squealed, trapping her in a huge wet hug as the gorgon slithered up. “But, why-?”

“Mabel, let me talk, because I’ve been trying to tell you this for like, two days now, and I’m not going to let another single thing get in my way,” Pacifica interrupted firmly. When she was positive that she had Mabel’s complete attention, she took the mermaid’s hands in her own. “Look. We’ve been friends for awhile now, and, it took me a long time, but… I really like you. And it took me even more time to get up the… the courage, to say anything, only to find that you’d planned this,” and she gestured at the party around them, “just to find some summer hookup.”

“Pacifica, I-”

“Not done.” She glared sternly at Mabel. “Mabel, I know you like the cliche romances and stuff, and… I’m not really great at that, but you? You deserve so much more than just some summer fling with some random guy who happens to be a little cuter than any other passing guy. You’re amazing, and you deserve someone who knows that, not someone just off the streets.” She tucked back a stray bit of her hair, which had been coiling up nervously over her forehead. “So, go on a date with me.” Mabel stared at her, slack-jawed, and she pressed on urgently. “I know, I’m not the kind of person you considered, but- but maybe give me a chance? Or-”

Mabel cut her off, bodily launching out of her tank to tackle her to the ground in a hug. “Yes yes yes yes yeee-grk…”

“Mabel!” Pacifica quickly dumped her back in her tank, where Mabel took a minute to get her breath back, before popping out of the water again.

“Yes! Pacifica, that was…” Her eyes were damp and sparkling, either from tears or from the water, Paz wasn’t sure. “Yes, I’d love to go out on a date with you!”

“Guys, this is really sweet, and I so, so hate to interrupt, but… the runes are down. We need to get everyone out of here ASAP,” Wendy informed them, jabbing a thumb towards the party-goers.

“No worries,” Mabel grinned, gesturing for Pacifica to hand her the microphone. “I got this.”

 

Xx

 

One mermaid song later, and the shack was cleared out, leaving only Wendy, Soos, Mabel and Pacifica. And Dipper, but he was still out in the bathroom, so…

“So, I was thinking… this coming Friday? I’ll come pick you up, we can go to dinner somewhere.”

Mabel grinned, taking the gorgon’s hand. “That sounds… that sounds really awesome.” They stood for a moment, then Mabel coughed. “You guys should uh, probably get out of here before the Stans get back, though.”

“What about cleanup, Hambone?”

Mabel waved at the enormous mess. “There is no way anybody is cleaning all that up before they get back, and there’s no way they missed that sound-splosion. I’ll just… talk them down. No worries.”

“If you’re sure…”

“We can stay and help out…”

“Are you positive?”

“Yeah! No sweat.” Mabel laughed, and this time, even with the impending “doom” of explaining this to her Grunkles, it was more like her light, bubbly self. “Go on, you guys!”

They left quickly, and Mabel saw them off, before rolling back into the party room to assess the damage.

Unfortunately, there were two someones waiting for her.

“Mabel.” Grunkle Stan stood, tapping his claw, arms crossed. “Mind telling me what happened here?”

She cracked a sheepish smile. “Stan! Ford! Haha… well, uh…”

“Mabel!” There was a crashing sound from the hallway, and she winced. A moment later, Dipper came stumbling into the room, wide-eyed and confused looking, gingerly rubbing his head. “Mabel, what’s going on? The Stans will be… here…” He trailed off, staring up at the Stans in growing dread. “Oh.”

“’Oh’ is right, kid,” Stan grumbled. “Now, what exactly happened?”

 

Xx

 

Mabel did most of the explaining, trying to stress her part in organizing it, since Dipper still seemed a little too drunk to deal with anything right now. The Stans listened with the most disapproving faces they could muster, although Stan looked like he was suppressing some pride at how the two had pulled the wool over their eyes.

After they’d finished, Stanford stood up. “Well, I hope you understand what you did wrong,” he said sternly, looking at them from over his glasses. The twins nodded guiltily.

“And you know you two are grounded for a long, long time.”

“Yeah.”

“Yep, that’s fair.”

Stanford nodded. “Good.”

“You two are gonna have to clean up this mess tomorrow, but for right now, go to your rooms and get some sleep,” Stanley added, gesturing to the door. The twins hung their heads and left. They paused at the bottom of the stairs, listening for a moment. They could hear the Stans talking, still.

“Well… that went better than expected!” Mabel whispered, trying to be optimistic.

“Yeah, sure…” Dipper grumbled, picking a piece of glass out of his hair. “Cleanup’s gonna suck, though…” He sighed. “Did you at least get your summer hookup?”

Mabel gasped. “Right, you weren’t there! No, I got something even better!”

“You two are still awake?”

They jumped, shrinking back a little as their Gargrunkle towered over them, one stony eyebrow raised. He glanced back towards the kitchen, then leaned in.

“Look, Ford’s gone down to the basement, so I’m gonna be quick- He’s only here for another two weeks. Once he leaves on vacation, your grounding is over and your bedtime is never. Also-” he reached into his pocket and pulled out two $5 Stan-bucks “here.” He patted their heads, a proud grin gracing his face. “Nice con, kids.” He frowned. “But seriously, get to sleep. You two have a _lot_ of work in the morning.”

He walked back out, no doubt to take up his own vigil on the roof of the shack, leaving the two stunned twins.

“You know,” Dipper started after a moment of silence, “I feel like there was a lesson we were supposed to learn here, and that we aren’t gonna learn it.”

“Yup!” Mabel giggled, grinning at her Stan-bucks. “Not at all.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Also, if you want to know what updates are happening, and when, I've just added an update calendar to my tumblr! Just check Mercuryhomophony.tumblr.com and check out the calendar on the right to see when the next chapter or short will be up! :3
> 
> Edit: forgot to mention, next week's update will be chapter 25 of TDaC~! :3


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